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Submitted on
May 22, 2006
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Even the wrong words seem to rhyme.
Even the right way is a crime.
Even the darkness sounds a chime.
Even the circles look like lines.
Even the sweet things taste like limes.
Even the hurting seem so fine.
Even the thirsty pay a dime.
Even the hungry cannot dine.
Even the water tastes like brine.
Even the acid looks like wine.
Even the boots can't make the climb.
Even the freedom seems to bind.
Even my thoughts can't stop my mind.
Even my faith shall fail sometimes.
This is a poem I wrote after hearing the line "Even the wrong words seem to rhyme."

Hope you enjoy it. The poem is about the fallacies in the word today, and the many things that just don't seem right.

EDIT: Changed a few of the lines in the middle of the lines. (Mostly from seems to another word). Hope you enjoy, especially new watchers.
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:iconflawedfairytale:
flawedfairytale Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Student Writer
even my empty heart can still remember you,
and even my ears can still hear a faint echo of your soft words.
even though, through my tear-ridden eyes, you're just a lost blur.


I really like this piece- the flow is lovely, with the rhyming couplets. And the final line is so powerful. :heart:
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah: It's supposed to be all the same rhyme, but I had to force a few since i couldn't think up enough exact rhymes.

:heart:

Mmhmm, the final line is my favorite for sure :giggle:

Even whispers can't be heard
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:iconflawedfairytale:
flawedfairytale Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Student Writer
Ahh, I see! It's very good. Rhyming takes a lot of patience- I always get stressed when writing rhyming poems. ^^;
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah. I tend to think of the rhyme first and fill in the rest later. That's why sonnets are so hard, because you have only a few syllables to work with.
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:iconflawedfairytale:
flawedfairytale Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Student Writer
Yeah, I've done that before now. ^^;
Haha, see how I've still not attempted another sonnet? I'm dreading the thought really, I'll have to be really dedicated when I do try, I think. ^^;
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
^^; Me tooo :giggle: Sonnets are hard work, but the outcome sure is lovely.
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:icondusk-of-stars:
Dusk-of-Stars Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009
WOAH!! good jobb
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks :heart:
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:icondusk-of-stars:
Dusk-of-Stars Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009
you're very welcome
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:iconplatinummyr:
platinummyr Featured By Owner Mar 4, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
:giggle: MMm I had fun writing this one. (Even if it was a while ago)
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